Thursday, December 7, 2006

Sleepless night, but house is going to be clean!

I hope this won't sound too whiny. Last night was excruciatingly painful. Not much sleep, hence me being slightly incoherent at the moment. I'm typing fast too so that I can get out of the way before the cleaning lady shows up. My mother-in-law pays for a cleaning lady to come every other week now, to save me the back spasms associated with vacuuming, bending, etc. I used to love cleaning. It's good for your soul in some ways. Now, I just stick to cleaning drawers and closets and stuff. Still satisfying.

Ok, so I'm a little anal retentive, maybe?

Did I say that I really love my mother-in-law? She is wonderful. So is my father-in-law.

Anyway, the last couple of weeks my normal neuropathies and the (brutal, at the moment) fatigue have had general body aches added for interest. You know when you have the flu, right at it's very worst and your body hurts so bad that you just want someone to put you out of your misery? It's like that. Then there are the stabbing pains up and down my spine. Not the L'hermittes kind of pain, I've had that before and didn't find it painful. Actually, it was kind of a weird feeling, every time I bent my neck it felt like an electric currant buzzing down my neck and spine. Not all that bad at all, except that my neck would get so tired from all the shocks that it felt like my head was just going to flop over onto my shoulder. ~l~ The weirdities of MS. No, there is no such word as weidities, but I like it.

Heat seems to help with the body pain somewhat, but I look absolutely ridiculous lying on the couch with all sorts and sizes of heated bean bag thingies stuck to me.

Going to get one of the damn things right now to put on my neck. Typing seems to be aggravating it.

That's much better.

Rob thinks that I should go back on my happy pills again. I agree. While I don't think that the current additional aches and pains have anything to do with stopping my sertraline, maybe I'd be better able to deal with it. Rob must get sick of the blubbering. He has never been anything other than supportive.. how do they do it, the husbands/wives/partners/caregivers? Granted, Rob and I are pretty pragmatic people, but he really just takes every day as it comes and doesn't worry about tomorrow (which, by the way, makes him a lousy bill payer, so I do that). It makes him a wonderful partner though. He listens to each new complaint, then hugs/rubs or just holds me until I feel better. He doesn't do the advice thing unless I ask for an opinion on something.. he cooks, gives me a break as soon as he comes home and lets me rest while he takes over the kids. Ok, he is perfect. Except he doesn't clean. Not a bit. ~s~

Where was I? Rambling again, lack of sleep and all that.

I phoned my manager at work to tell her that I wouldn't be in this week again. I only worked one day out of four last week, and will miss another 4 this one. I also requested the paperwork for LTD so that we can look it over and discuss it with the doc next week at my appointment. If nothing else, I need a note for work excusing me for the sick time. Much as I love working, I just can't go for a whole day (especially a 10 hour shift) anymore without rest. When I'm at home I often nap for up to 3 hours in the afternoon. And that after having slept in on days when I not feeling well.

Strange, after being a morning person all of my life, I'm no longer able to get out of bed in the morning. I used to be up at 5am, full of energy. Now I hate the thought of setting foot to floor before 9 or 10 or later, if not feeling well. Then another rest in the afternoon. And then I might start to finally feel human after dinner. Which is when we are all together as a family, so I'll take that.

Got to go. Cleaning lady is taking over the house.


mdmhvonpa said...

"Ok, he is perfect. Except he doesn't clean. Not a bit. "

Ok, a husband who does not clean. What are the chances!? ;) Aside from that little MS thing, it sound like a little slice of heaven up there.

Amanda said...

Husbands who clean are a bit overrated anyway. You usually end up spending all the time and energy you've saved, to look for daily necessities that will not be where they are supposed to anymore.

And God forbid he actually gets inspired to wash some clothes. You better have some money stashed to replace all those white-turned-pink tees!

Ok, silliness aside, I think it's that you have the support you need!

personallog! said...

Merry christmas and hope you are well!


Charles-A. Rovira said...


Amanda, I resemble that remark.

Actually, when I was living in Ottawa, my sin was putting woolens in the dryer.

Many a great sweater went from human to doll sized.

My first wife eventually forgave me those lapses of reason. :-)

It is one I have not repeated with the second... (See we can learn...)

I now make sure everything we own can go into the dryer. :-)


As for sleepless nights, I've had quite a few that had nothing to do with my MS.

I sla, uh, labor in high tech and I've spend many an night burning the candle at both ends. (But when I do finally crash its quite effective.)

I hope every thing's okay with you though. The different sized heating pads sounds like riding the razor's edge between finding relief and incapacitation.

Charles-A. Rovira said...

Actually, having an artistic bent that's looking for expression describes my life to a tee.

I cant draw or make music anymore but I've found some release in putting a podcast together.

Check it out at and see if you like it.

Maybe you'd even like to be on the show. (I've tried luring MDMHvonPA into doing it but he's too shy, or something. :-)

Maggie said...

Hi Heidi

Such a sweet photo of your girls. Sorry to hear you're battling at the mo. Hope the pain eases up. I have the same support in my Michael as you have in your hubby. Aren't we lucky to have them?